MachoTomato
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MachoTomato 1236635191|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
this is the place for everyone to post their blonde jokes.
(I made this because, thanx to Dr. Doom, i have been informed that this is the other major joke type, as opposed to cannibal and knock knock jokes.)
Dr Doom 1236909444|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb?
2
One to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder!!
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
Dr Doom 1236909648|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
a blonde, a brunette and a redhead are walking in the forest.
The brunette looks down and says, "Look! Deer tracks!"
The redhead looks down and says,"Look! Wolf tracks!"
The blonde looks down and says, "I can't figure out what these tracks are!" and then is hit by a train.
LOLOLOLOLOLOL
Dr Doom 1236909899|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
These two blondes are working on a construction site. One has a job hammering on the siding with nails. However, when he reaches into his nail pouch, sometimes he hammers them in, but sometimes he throws them away. The other blonde notices and walks over.
"Why are you throwing away all those nails?" he asks.
"Well," says the other, "when I pick some up, some of them are defective; they face the wrong way!"
"You idiot!" shouts the first.
"Those are for the other side of the house!"
Dr Doom 1236911864|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
Ok, this is an older blonde joke that i posted in the lolololololololjokes thread before this one was made.
I am now placing it in its proper location.
It shall be noted that I was the first to suggest this thread.
It shat also be noted that so far I am the only one to post on this thread. I am officially surprised.
Anyhow, here it is!
A blond, a brunette and a redhead were robbing a house together. They cleared out the bottom floor and were going to rob the second floor, where the master bedroom was.
As the brunette went up the stairs, he stepped on a creaky step. C-R-E-A-K!!
"Who‘s there!" Came a shout from upstairs.
"Meow! Meow!" said the brunette.
"Don`t worry, it`s just the cat!" said another voice upstairs, and the brunette started hauling away their electronics.
The redhead started going up the stairs andstepped on a creaky step. C-R-E-A-K!!
"Who`s there!" Came a shout from upstairs.
"Meow! Meow!" said the brunette.
"Don`t worry, it`s just the cat!" said another voice upstairs, and the redhead began stuffing all their jewelery into a sack.
Then the blond went up the stairs, and stepped on a creaky step. C-R-E-A-K!!
"Who`s there!" Came a shout from upstairs.
Then the blond said,
"Don`t worry! It’s just the cat!!!!!!"
Dr Doom 1237943932|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
A blind guy walks into a bar. He taps someone on the shoulder and says "Hey! Wanna hear a great blonde joke?"
The guy turns around and says, "Hey, buddy. I'm blonde, the bartender's blonde, the weightlifter in the table next to us is blonde, and so is the contruction worker in the corner. Are you sure you still want to tell you're blonde joke?"
To which the blind guy responds, "No, I don't think so.
I don't want to have to explain it that many times."
lolololololololololololololololololololololololololol
MachoTomato 1237945719|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
A blonde and a brunette were driving down a road, in their car, when they pass by a house.
Outside the house in the front yard is another blonde sitting in a rowboat rowing… In no water!
So the blonde in the car rolls down her window and shouts as they drive by, "It's blondes like you that make the rest of us look dumb!"
The brunette says to the blonde, "you wanna pull over and go teach her a lesson?"
The blonde replies, "No thanks."
"I can't swim."
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLLOLLLOLOL>LLL
MachoTomato 1237946488|%e %b %Y, %H:%M %Z|agohover
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead were on a boat together in the middle of the pacific.
All of a sudden their boat runs out of gas.
So they swim to a nearby island and try to assess their situation.
The blonde decides to take advantage of the warm sunlight to do some tanning, while the brunette and the redhead go exploring for food. Neither of them are successful.
After an hour or two of looking around they find the island is quite small, with no fresh water, and no food.
Suddenly the brunette shouts to the blonde and the redhead, "Hey! Look what I found!" In her hand is a golden lamp.
The blonde ignores her while the redhead runs over to see. "what's it do?" she asks.
"I dunno. I just found this lamp on the ground." replies the brunette.
"You should rub it like in the movies."
"ok," the brunette rubs the lamp, and out pops a genie.
"taadaa! i will grant each of you one wish for releasing me from my lamp!" declaires the genie.
The brunette stops to think. Finally she says, "you know, I have lots of friends back home who would miss me if I stayed here, so… I wish to go home."
Instantly she disappears, and is back home with her friends.
"You know what," says the redhead to the genie, "thatsounds pretty reasonable, so… I wish to go home too." In stantly she disappears and is back home with her friends and family.
By this time the blonde notices the disappearance of her friends and looks around her.
She sighs, then says to herself,
"Man, I wish my friends were here."
LOLOLOL nother good one!
:P :) :D
